SPOKEN 5.2
Proof: Show the Problem

Grades 1-3

The last part of the Why needs to prove what you said in the Introduction and Describe. Just because you say something happened does not mean it did.

Fiction Writing vs. Storytelling

Fiction writing is based on plays, movies, television shows. It is not storytelling, which is based on telling stories around a campfire.

Plays, movies, and TV shows show us what is happened. They don’t have a storyteller sitting there telling us. 

To show the story, use these:

  • Dialog. What did people say?
  • Sensory Details. Use three or more things the characters hear, smell, see, touch, and taste. 
  • Name things. Don’t just say there was a bush, for example. What type of bush? And don’t just say it was sunny.  How sunny? Was sweat running down your back? 

Plan the Proof

Plan out the proof, but don’t make it long and complicated.

Keep Your Story Simple!

  • Limit yourself to 1-3 scenes.  As a class, decide on the scenes. If possible, have them in the same place.  Do not have the scenes take place where you met the dog.
  • As the story goes, the problem must get worse for the hero.
  • Do not solve the problem – yet.

Task 5.2.1 – Class

  • Once you have your scenes decided on, make a list for each scene. Use the tasks below. 

For instance, in our example story, four scenes happen after you met the troublemaker. So make four columns on a chart. They should look like grocery lists.

Don’t worry if you have more in your lists than you will need. You can always not use some information.

Prank calls Police officer arrives Prank calls to police Police officer returns
Refrigerator running.

Dog was curled up on his blanket under a desk.

Sorrowful eyes when you caught him. 		Officer Wallaby is a woman about 30 years old. Blond. Ponytail.

You're afraid to tell her about the dog. She won't believe you.

She smells like perfume.

"You're the only person who speaks Athabascan!" 		I put the phone way up high where my books are, so the dog wouldn't reach it.

A thunk in the night.

Sorrowful eyes again.

Bad guys? Flu. 		Officer Wallaby sees me with the dog.

Her uniform is ironed.

"It can talk?"

Task 5.2.2 – Class

  • Limit the number of characters (other than you and the dog) to 1-3. For each person, tell what their gender is, what they look like, interesting things about their appearance, the sound of their voice, and so on.

Task 5.2.3 – Class

  • With your teacher’s help, role-play so you have some dialog.  Your teacher will take down notes.

Task 5.2.4 – Class

  • Name specific things, such as trees, cars, cereal boxes, TV shows and so on, so readers or listeners can more easily visualize each scene.

Example

Pretend you take the dog home. Your mother doesn’t like dogs indoors. You sneak him in.

  • That night, you catch him making calls and talking in Athabascan. He is saying things like, “Is your refrigerator running? It is? Well, you better go catch it!”
  • The next day, the village police officer visits your house. You are the only person who speaks Athabascan, so everyone thinks you were making the calls.
  • The next night, the dog calls the police officer’s home. “Do you ever catch any bad guys?” the dog asks her in Athabascan. And before she can answer, he says, “You couldn’t catch the flu!”
  • The next day, the police officer visits your house again. She recorded the call. She knows it wasn’t you talking, but she has figured out that the call came from your house.

Task 5.2.5 – Small Group

Use numbers to put each column in order. What did you see or hear first?  What was second? What action happened first? What was second? Use numbers to show what happened in what order. Put each column’s information and actions in order.  Use numbers.  If you make mistakes, then use numbers or letters to add in things.

Prank calls Police officer arrives Prank calls to police Police officer returns
1. Refrigerator running.

2. Dog was curled up on his blanket under a desk.

3. Sorrowful eyes when you caught him. 		1. Officer Wallaby is a woman about 30 years old. Blond. Ponytail.

4. You're afraid to tell her about the dog. She won't believe you.

2. She smells like perfume.

3. "You're the only person who speaks Athabascan!" 		1. I put the phone way up high where my books are, so the dog wouldn't reach it.

2. A thunk in the night.

4. Sorrowful eyes again.

3. Bad guys? Flu. 		1.Her uniform is ironed.

1a. Dog and the maple tree.

2. Officer Wallaby sees me with the dog.

3. “It can talk?”

4.We’ll be rich!” – Mom.

APPLICATION

  • Create a grocery list for each scene in the Problem part of your story.  
  • Use numbers to organize each list. 
  • Once you all agree on the numbered list, then your teacher will type up the results and give each of you a copy.
  • Add the list to your story, below Introduction and Describe.

ADVANCED APPLICATION

Use the computer to cut and paste a storyboard.  A storyboard shows each scene and part of a scene. Find pictures of the dog, your main characters, and so on. Then print the copies and use scissors to put out the characters. Put them together into a scene.  Move them around to show the parts of the scene. You might have to print and cut the pictures more than once. Then photocopy the result.